level 8
When I was talking to Chrisliu on Monday, and we were talking about my birthday, he was asking me to write something on my 18th birthday just like he did, and I said I had nothing to write down, it is just a birthday, hehe…. But just now when I was in bed, and thinking about these 7 months that I am spending in America, the time goes faster than what I thought, I am gonna be 18 several hours later, and I am gonna be an adult several hours later, and I am gonna celebrate my special birthday in a special country with some special people..…What makes me came to America and cannot see my family and my friends for a year? What makes me live here by myself and start a brand new life without anybody’s help? I feel ridiculous when I thought about that, because back then, that reason was evade study and try to find some good looking white guys in America that I like and I don’t have to see the stinking teachers in China anymore, nobody would control me anymore and I can do whatever I want to do… That was what I wanted before I came… That was the freedom I wanted….. And I kept dream this “stupid” wish until my first day at school in USA. Culture, language, manners, class, test, family, friends… What was the heck I am doing in here? Where is my family? Where are my friends? Where are the good looking guys? Where am I? I kept ask myself those “stupid” questions for at lease 2 months… I didn’t remember how many times I cried when I saw the letters and pictures that my family and my friends sent it to me, and I didn’t remember how many times I felt lonely when I ate in cafeteria by myself, and I didn’t remember how long was the home works took me to figure out what it said…. I felt upset, frustrated and wanted go back immediately… Probably because god thinks 2 lonely months were enough for me or I became more mature than I was, but I think during those two months, I already experienced the hardest period in USA. Even though I had some dumb reasons before I came, I am still thankful that I came to America; this is the best decision I’ve ever made. The new environment makes me change a lot and I have being learning a lot… To my real parents, I don’t know how to express myself; thanks for trained me for 17 years, I love you in my whole entire life, and thank you for spent plenty of money to sent me to USA, I knew I disappointed you a lot, and you still forgave me…. but I promise, not anymore. I will try my best to do as well as I could, you will be proud of your daughter. I will never let the promise go! I love you soooo much! I love you- dad, mom…
2007年04月11日 19点04分
